For The Will Of It, Part 2
by pantheradraconis
Summary: Draco and Harry learn the real differences between them; will their relationship last through the secrets?
1. Chapter 1

For The Will Of It, Part 2

Chapter 1: History

By pantheradraconis

"Ah, Granger, there you are. I have been looking all over this castle trying to find you. I looked in the dungeons, the great hall, the Quidditch field, everywhere! Who would have thought you'd be studying in the library." Draco's smooth sarcasm barely made the brunette flinch.

"Oh no, poor Malfoy. Having to walk around everywhere trying to find me. How will I survive with this guilt." She turned the page of her potions book trying to figure out how Harry came to the conclusion to add a mustard seed instead of six of the steps listed in her directions. Half-Blood Prince or not, you can't just ignore half the potion.

Realizing he wasn't getting the attention he deserved, Draco sat across from the Gryffindor and cleared his throat loudly enough for the librarian to shush him. Hermione continued to ignore him easily; it seems her years of attempted studying with Ron and Harry had paid off, she could now ignore anyone.

Seeing that all his normal efforts towards getting Hermione's attention would fail, Draco decided an unexpected approach. In a hushed tone, appropriate for a library, Draco said, "Excuse me dear Hermione, wisest of wise in Hogwarts. I find myself in need of your ever patient, ever diligent, ever knowing brain." Hermione finally looked up and eyed Draco cautiously. Although she found herself approving of Harry and Draco's relationship, she still wasn't sure if she trusted the young Slytherin in front of her. Draco decided to continue. "I've found myself very happily in a relationship with your best friend, but seeing that I'm not used to... Well, I'm not used to dating a _guy_, I don't know what would be an appropriate idea of a date. I also don't think Harry would be quite as excited about a fancy restaurant, followed by a walk in the park and me trying to get up a slightly drunk girl's shirt." Hermione frowned. "Now wait and listen. I'm saying that I want better for Harry. I don't have the best history of being romantic. I was mostly just looking for approval from my friends. I'm a guy, it's what's to be expected. I'm also a Slytherin, being with the best Pureblood girls and getting the farthest is expected. Harry... he's shown me that I don't need to be what's expected of me, how do I show him that I understand?"

By the end of his speech, the blond was very apprehensive of what type of reaction he'd get from the Gryffindor. If it had been a Slytherin girl, she probably would have laughed and told him to just shag the boy. Although that idea had passed Draco's mind, many a night, it wasn't what he was trying to do. At least not for this date. They'd only been going out for a month and the few times they'd gone on "dates" had simply been short trips to Hogsmeade and getting away from their friends to have a butterbeer together. Draco mostly just wanted to bring Harry on as special a date as their first had been.

Hermione allowed a small smile to break from her lips and a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding, slip out. "I guess you really do like Harry. Now you really can't be surprised that I would think you'd have ulterior motives, even after all this time. It's good to know your intentions are pure." Draco smirked at the word 'pure' but Hermione simply ignored her mis-choice of words. "Harry is simple, that's probably why you're having so many problems thinking of what to do for him. You're right that he wouldn't really care about how much money you spent on the date. In fact, he'd probably like you more if you could do something that's free. Having Ron as a best friend makes it difficult for Harry to spend a lot of money. He also grew up poor, so I guess he just doesn't think of money as important. That's probably really weird to you, but just remember, you chose him! Now as for something simple and free."

Hermione started to ponder about dream dates she and her female friends had discussed growing up. There were many simple things to do, like walk in the park... without the groping that is. They could do something having to do with Quidditch, maybe go to see a match, or practice, meet the team. She was sure Draco could make that happen. But it just didn't seem right. There was a certain amount of, dare she say it, intimacy that was missing from it.

"History." The brunette stated, an invisible light bulb above her head.

"I'm sorry?"

Giggling, Hermione replied, "You two have history. And the past is very important to Harry. He holds onto his friends because of what we've been through, he holds onto Professor Dumbledore and Sirius and Hagrid because of their friendships with his parents. History. Out of everyone in Hogwarts Harry has held only two relationships longer than the one he holds with you. Now, while Hagrid and Ron were certainly friendship, the interaction between the two of you was always constant. Always important. Always at the forefront of Harry's mind."

Draco let that theory set in his mind a bit. "Okay, that's true. But what does that have to do with a date?"

Hermione sighed, "I'm not the one dating here and I have work to do. Figure it out yourself, Malfoy. You're smart enough."

*** *** ***

"Figure it out yourself, Malfoy. You're the one dating, Malfoy. Always constant, always vigilant. Stupid git."

"Have you always been one to wander the grounds talking to yourself? Or is this some dark magic Potter has put on you to keep anyone else from trying to steal you away?"

Draco found himself confronted by Pansy, of all his luck, catching him talking to himself while wandering near the lake.

"Why Ms. Parkinson. To what do I owe this pleasure?"

"My dear Mr. Malfoy, I am simply concerned with your well-being. In all the years I've caught you mumbling to yourself it's always been about stupid Potter, never a mention of your own name. Strange that a turn away from your narcissism would cause the change in topics." Pansy smiled at her own words, thinking to herself how astute she has become with the English language. She knew exactly how this conversation would go. She would bring up the name Potter and Draco would go all berserk. Maybe not like he used to, but Pansy was sure once the "new love" vibe ended, Draco would go back to complaining about the Gryffindor. Maybe the complaints would change to bad kissing techniques or poorly dressed for some date, but the idea would be the same and that would be enough for Pansy.

"You know what? You're right." Pansy turned to look Draco in the eye, confused. "I should be talking about myself. Tell me Pansy, when did we meet?"

"Uh, well, what?"

"When did I make your acquaintance? When did we become such great allies? When did we swear we'd be in Slytherin together?"

Regaining her composure after the conversation she had planned collapsed, "Well, we must have been as young as three when we met, just babies anyhow. You've been around for so long, our parents being friends and all. It was you and me until around seven or so. Then Muris showed up. Not that I didn't like him, don't give me that look. I just wasn't too sure about playing with him."

Draco smiled at this, "That's just because when we played house, he never wanted to be your husband. I always played the husband and he played the ever loyal servant to the man of the house. It's amazing the implications that small role played at such a young age." Draco laughed out loud. "My we were strange children."

Pansy smiled too, "It was all fun and games back then. Just the three of us running around like animals, searching the quote, jungles of Africa, unquote, or just pretending to be our parents." The mood dropped a little, they both felt it. "I think it was around the age of ten or so when we all promised to be in Slytherin together. And only when we got our letters from Hogwarts that Muris found out he was going to Durmstrang. Then it wasn't Muris, you and me. I don't even know if it was you and me any more."

"What do you mean? It's always been me and you, Pansy. You're the only one whose gotten me as far as this. The only one who really knew..."

"I know that, but when we came to Hogwarts it was you and Crabbe and Goyle. And then it was Nott and Blaine and you. Just imagine if Potter had been in Slytherin. You two would have been inseparable from day one. Things would have been so different." The brunette girl stared out across the lake letting her mind slip back. Soon she laughed, "Just image it Draco! I bet you would have taken Potter to the Yule Ball instead of me!"

Draco laughed too, "Don't be crazy. I never would have chosen him over you!"

But Pansy had stopped laughing and took a cold, sober look at her friend. "Draco, you've always picked Harry first." Using the Griffyndor's first name to make a point, Pansy pressed on. "Even without being his friend, you choose him over Crabbe and Goyle for company, over Nott and Blaine for a challenge, over me for a teenage crush, and even over Muris. When we were young you picked me to pretend marry over Muris. Remember that? Muris was so upset; he wanted to be with you forever. Of course this was before we knew everything involved in love and marriage, but even then you felt like you were supposed to follow some law your father put forth. That was even before Lucius told you he had arranged our marriage with my parents. I swear, if your head hadn't of been so thick maybe you would have agreed with Muris back then. It took going to Hogwarts, growing away from your father, and getting a backbone for you just to realize that you were wrong all that time. And then, after all that, you chose Harry and not Muris. It was inevitable, I guess."

Draco sat down on the grass. A year ago he would have worried about grass stains on his newly pressed pants, but with all that has happened around him, it was the least of his worries. "If Potter had taken my hand on the Hogwarts Express 6 years ago, everything would have been different." They sat in silence for several minutes when Draco cleared his throat. "That's the history I've been looking for."


	2. Chapter 2

For The Will Of It, Part 2

Chapter 2: Descent

By pantheradraconis

Draco pulled his shirt over his head and threw it to the floor behind him in a fury. Looking around he found a black button-down looking almost identical to the one now occupying a space amongst five other shirts he had dismissed as proper attire. The new shirt fit perfectly and complimented Draco's sharp edges, but he fumed with disgust. Flopping down on his bed he gave out an unflattering noise, about to give up on his outfit and just go on his date naked. It was nearly 8pm, he was running out of time and out of patience. Why did nothing fit right?

Draco flipped over onto his stomach and propped his head up on his hands, staring into his overflowing closet. _It's amazing how I could own so many clothes and yet not have anything to wear._ Draco thought to himself. Glancing over shirt after shirt, pants after pants, the blond's eyesight kept stopping on his school robes. He laughed to himself, _Right, perfect. I'll just wear my school robes and not have to think about it._ But then it hit him, _That's the perfect outfit!_

With that Draco jumped off the bed, dropped the clothes he was wearing and quickly fitted himself as if he were on his way to class. Quickly pressing his hair down, the Slytherin left the disheveled room and sprinted out of the dungeons and up what seemed to be 500 stairs. Exhausted and panting, Draco walked up to the portrait of the Fat Lady and nearly keeled over. He balanced himself and was able to speak clearly at exactly 8pm.

"Would you mind announcing the arrival of Draco Malfoy to Harry Potter. Thank you." The Fat Lady was used to Draco calling on Harry and found it adorable the way the Slytherin asked to be announced.

Giggling, the portrait bellowed out, "Harry Potter!" Draco hadn't quite gotten used to the shriek, but figured it wasn't like the Fat Lady could disappear into the Common Room and politely retrieve Harry. At least, Draco liked the think that, but the real case was that the Fat Lady just loved to look at the blond. Especially the face he made whenever his Gryffindor date appeared.

After a few moments, Harry walked through the portrait smiling. He closed the portrait door and thanked the Fat Lady. While doing this, Draco took the time to look over Harry's outfit. The blond had noticed a drastic change in the way Harry dressed for their dates. It seemed that the Parvati twins had been giving the Gryffindor tips on color coordination and even hair gel. Tonight Harry was wearing a dark maroon button down shirt with silver cuff links in the shape of snakes. His jeans were a light blue and slightly ruffled, but fit well and even complimented the teenager's shape in ways that Draco greatly appreciated. His shoes were the same everyday shoes Harry wore, but his hair was softly tousled with gel and falling over the brunette's face, making his green eyes sparkle through.

When Harry turned back to say hi to Draco he stuttered and cocked his head. "Well, I...err... Are you here to cancel on me? Or are we going to class together?"

Draco smiled, but said nothing. He took the Gryffindor's hand and led him down the stairs (_all those stairs!_) and out the front door. "You look very handsome."

Harry smiled and replied, "Thank you. I've been getting great tips."

"I especially love the cuff-links. Snakes look good on you."

"Hah! If only everyone had thought that in second year, right?" Harry let out a small laugh, but decided to change his own subject. "So, were you going to tell me about the dress code, or is it a Draco exclusive look tonight?"

"I would have, but it didn't come to me until it was too late. And besides, I wouldn't trade that outfit you're wearing for any sentimental point I could think of making."

This confused Harry, but over the past 6 years, the brunette had learned not to try and understand the blond before him. After all, understanding him might mess with the Gryffindor's head.

As the two walked past the grounds entrance, Harry found himself more and more curious as to where they were going. "Are we going into Hogsmeade? Are we going to the Three Broomsticks for a butterbeer?"

"No."

"Oh, well, that was a simple answer. Is this a guessing game? Oh, alright, how about.... the owlry. You like it there. Or are we escaping through a series of Floo Networks to an exotic island where we rule over the monkey population?"

Draco turned and looked at Harry, "Would you like that?"

"Huh?"

"To escape, to run away. To be in a place where it's just us. All that that you were just saying. Did you really just forget or are you acting?"

"Oh, no. Yes. I mean, I didn't forget, I just thought you were kidding. I was kidding. I mean, I guess sometimes I wish I could go off somewhere and maybe even rule monkeys, but no. I have too much to leave behind."

"Yeah." Draco breathed, "Me too."

Before Harry could speak again the two walked up to the train station. "We're here!" Draco exclaimed happily.

Harry looked around, but saw only the station and Draco walking up the steps. "You know there isn't a train, right? Just the station."

The Slytherin laughed and motioned for his date to join him. The two walked the ramp along the tracks with Draco counting. "One, two.. How long do you think the trailers are? I was thinking from this bench to that one." He motioned to a bench not too far ahead of them. Harry looked around seeing the front of the ramp where the train would stop and tried to envision what it looks like with all the students there. The train seemed to hold several compartments per trailer and each held about 4 students comfortably. He nodded his agreement and followed the counting blond.

"Here, I think this is it." Draco announced proudly. They had walked several yards and were almost to the end of the ramp and Harry had yet to understand what was going on.

"Okay, this is what?"

"This," Draco continued, "This is where we first met. Well, no, not really, we met in Diagon alley, but this is where we first started our relationship. This is the compartment where I reached out my hand and asked you to be my friend."

The smile on Draco's face confused Harry. "Yes, but I refused it. I refused it because you insulted Ron."

"Yes!"

"I'm not sure I understand." Harry was quite baffled by Draco's excitement towards being refused all those years ago.

"You turned me down and it blew my mind. It was the first time in my life that I had ever been refused! Don't you see? I had always gotten anything I wanted and people begged to be my friend, but not you. You had no problem telling me to get lost. You challenged me for the first time in my life."

"And you were happy about that?"

"No, don't be absurd. I was furious! You were, well still are, but that's not the point, you were the most popular, most famous person on that train. I was seconded for the first time in my life and I hated you for it, and you hated me too. That anger is what fueled the two of us to do half the things we have done in our lives. I mean, yeah sure there was/is the Dark Lord and other faculties, but let's be honest. I always wanted to bring you down and you always wanted to catch me in the act. Starting with me catching you out of bed after hours, then you making me out to be the one who opened the Chamber of Secrets, all the way to me trying to get you kicked off the Quidditch team, and you stalking me. We were always all about the other one."

"I'm not sure I quite follow you. I get that we hated each other, but what does that have to do with now? Why would you bring me here on a date to remind me of all the things we did to spite each other?"

"History." Draco declared triumphantly. Harry nearly slumped with confusion, but Draco went on before Harry had to ask any more questions. "This spot, well that spot where the train actually stood, is where we made ourselves. This was our defining moment. I never would have been able to break away from my father or grow a backbone or to admit my attraction to you if you hadn't made me obsessed with your downfall from day one. And you would never have become so obsessed with me if we had been friends. Or if you had been in Slytherin. We made history right here."

Harry let everything sink into his head, trying to figure out the significance that Draco was explaining. _On that day, I turned away from Draco to support Ron. Later on, at the sorting, I told the hat I wanted to be in Gryffindor instead of Slytherin. I wanted to be with Ron instead of with Draco. _"Huh. Look at that." Harry let out a breath of new thought. "I guess, in a way, I choose Gryffindor to be away from you. Do you know what the hat said to me?"

"It talks to you?"

Harry laughed, "That's right, that hat barely touched your head before declaring Slytherin. I guess you never heard it. Yeah it talks to you, tells you what you're thinking and what it means. At least it did for me. It probably doesn't get that in depth with everyone; I was sitting on that stool for a while. But yeah, it told me I'd be great in Slytherin, that it would help me achieve all my goals. But I just kept saying 'not Slytherin' to myself and eventually the hat listened. Or at least, I supposed it did."

Draco sat down at a bench nearby and looked at Harry. The two boys' eyes stared with such meaning the two were almost overwhelmed. Draco broke the intensity with the comment, "I wonder what would have happened if the hat had asked me where I wanted to be. I'm assuming I would choose Slytherin, but the idea of having a choice at all."

"Oh, but you do have a choice, Draco. It's already set in you though. Maybe you aren't thinking about it or maybe you don't expect it to be what is chosen, but that hat, that spell that was cast on it, knows. It knows what you're going to be and how each house could help you achieve that."

The blond looked disappointed. "I guess that means I was meant for Slytherin no matter what. That the path I've been given is the one I'm stuck with." A single tear fell from the blond's eye.


	3. Chapter 3

For The Will Of It, Part 2

Chapter 3: Admonisher

By pantheradraconis

Harry turned away to look at the train tracks. His sudden interest in the invisible train caused him to miss the Slytherin's internal collapse and instead focus on the history that Draco had been trying to explain.

"All those years ago and we're still being affected by one small, seemingly insignificant, conversation. It's baffling really. I never thought anything I did would affect my life nearly as much as Voldemort." Draco, still sitting on the bench, shuddering to hear the Dark Lord's name, quickly wiped his face dry and listened more carefully. "Every year I feel like I've got a new challenge to face. A new enemy, a new supporter, a new Death Eater, a new Defensive Against the Dark Arts teacher! Every year I would lean on Ron and Hermione, but even with them, there were times when we didn't speak at all. How did you become my constant?"

Harry's speech ended abruptly; Draco barely had time to react before the Gryffindor turned, with a big smile on his face, and grabbed his date up into a rib-cracking hug. The Slytherin quickly retaliated with a lick to Harry's ear, causing the brunette to shiver and lighten his grip. The two stood on the platform, grey eyes staring into green, and began to laugh. The night had come over them and Harry found himself shiver. Whether it was from the cold, or the close proximity Draco's body heat was to his, he was never sure.

"Well, if I do say so myself, and I do, we are officially even in amazing dates." Draco stated with amusement. "Now it's your turn; I suspect you'll be taking me to those monkeys we will be ruling over in several years to come?"

"Why yes, I actually have a map all charted out in my room, if you'd like to join me."

"Why dear Mr. Potter, I do believe you have caused me to blush. An invitation to your room? And me without any wine."

"Oh I'm sure you'll whine about the state of it."

The two boys laughed and walked back to the castle arm-in-arm. The pace Harry was taking them at was rather fast, and Draco quickly found himself nervous. He wasn't lying when he claimed to have blushed, and it was growing ever more apparent with each step closer to the castle that the blond was very nervous to be in his boyfriend's bedroom.

_**What's wrong with you?! You've been dreaming about this moment for years! Now's your chance! Go for the gold... and red!**_Draco found his thoughts snickering to themselves (or is it himself?) The conflict between his brain and his, _**brain**_, were obvious. _Is this really an invitation to sex? Am I really going to finally see Harry naked? No, no, that couldn't be it. We're just going to hang out. __**Yeah, right, two guys, boyfriends, hanging out in a dorm room, alone together, and all they're going to do is talk? **__Exactly! __**That'll be the day, but even if you don't have sex, you might get a little head. And it's been a long time since we've had a tongue wrapped around our...**__ But what if the room isn't empty? It is a dorm after all. All the rooms have 5 __beds, meaning 5 guys. The only privacy is a curtain. There's no way anything is going to happen. __**That Gryffindor is really rubbing off on you. Are you not a wizard? Have you never heard of a Silencing Charm?!**_

"Oh, of course!"

"Excuse me?" Harry laughed as the two walked through the main doors and crossed in front of the entrance to the Great Hall. "Were you responding to an unasked question?"

"Err, no. Umm, of course was meant for you, for your question. I would love to come to your room with you."

Harry blushed, but the rising red barely made it to his ears when a voice, the Gryffindor knew all to well as the ending of any fun he might be having, cut into the boys' conversation.

"Well if it isn't Mr. Potter and Mr. Malfoy. The latest gossip makers." Snape's slow drawl broke into the hallway as the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher himself stepped out of the shadows of the dungeons entrance. "I'm sure you two have already finished your essays on the origins of the giants?"

"Yes, of course, it'll be on your desk Monday morning."

Harry tried to spit out his response quickly and turn to continue his way with Draco, but he was stopped again by the professor's voice. "I'm sure." Snape's dark eyes looked the Gryffindor up and down before turning his attention to Draco. "Mr. Malfoy, I wish to discuss an important issue with you. Come with me to my office."

Snape turned back toward the dungeons without a second thought, confident that his Slytherin protégé would follow. Draco, with little hesitation, took a step toward the dungeons entrance. Then he turned back toward Harry, who now wore a frown on his face. "I'll, only be a minute. I can meet you up there."

"Yeah, whatever you say."

With that the two boys parted.

*** *** ***

"What is it?" Draco had been standing in Snape's office for several minutes without any more recognition than a glance when he had entered through the door. Now growing upset that his professor was simply wasting his time, he was becoming moody and challenging.

"You and that boy end things now." The sentence was plain and said in monotone. It took a second for Draco to react; it seemed that if he hadn't been paying attention, the comment would have gone completely unheard. The blond stepped forward, with his hand raised, about to start arguing when Snape continued, "Your mother called after you. Ask how you were... handling things." Draco lost his step and stumbled to his left. His hip banged into a large wooden chair, but he caught himself on the arm before falling completely. "You've been a fool." The boy corrected his step and leaned into the chair. "Have you forgotten your family? All for this silly crush?" His body collapse into the seat, arms limp over the sides of the chair.

The room stayed silent while Draco let his mind slip back to the beginning of the year, when his life had changed so drastically. Harry had been right, Draco was up to something, and there was a lot more than just a Pensieve in the Room of Requirements. But none of that has mattered for the last month. Draco had lost himself in his, well, in his crush. _What a stupid thing to do_.

"You're right." Draco breathed, "I've been a fool."

"Yes, of course, I'm right. You were given a job to do, and although you are too proud to tell me what it is, so that I might help you, you still have to finish it. Your life is at stake, your mother's life is at stake. And you simply go about holding hands and giggling like a ten year old girl. We are at war, Draco. It is time for you to start acting like it." Snape's speech ended loudly, but shortly after the sound resonated around the room, his shoulders fell softly. He wouldn't admit it, but Draco had the feeling that his godfather had to say all these things to him, but didn't want to. The Slytherin knew he had been given an impossible task, and everyone agreed he was too young; most also agreed the Dark Lord was simply playing with him before killing his entire family. He also knew that no one expected him to succeed. He had forgotten (how could he have forgotten?) just what this year was meant to be for him. It was a fighting chance, and he was going to lose because of a distraction. Because of a siren call he didn't turn away from.

Draco, once again, felt the power of his world crushing down on his shoulder. His breathing became more shallow, and his vision blurry. The weight of everything he had to do, of everything he couldn't do, pushed down on his head, his shoulders, his lungs, his legs, until finally, the boy's body slumped to the ground and pressed itself into the stone. Draco could see this happening to himself, see his body on the floor, being consumed by the pressure, becoming one with the castle because the weight was greater than any stone, magical or not, could hold up.

The Slytherin looked up from his seat in the large wooden chair, across from Snape's desk, and saw a vast amount of pain in his godfather's eyes. He immediately knew that the pressure he felt, that the weight of being pressed into the castle itself, was the same in the man across from him. His weight relaxed, almost as if his godfather had taken some of the burden from him, and the blond lifted himself from his chair.

Holding Snape's gaze as he traveled toward the door, Draco found the strength to remain whole, to lift up each foot after the other, and to eventually leave the office. His track was slow, and a lot of time had passed while in his professor's office, but Draco knew that the only place he wanted to end up was in Harry's room. If he was going to end things at all, it had to be now, while he still had the strength.

The fat lady called for Harry, and when he came to the door, Draco knew at once that tonight was the last night he would have to drift through this dream world he'd been in ever since Harry first kissed him. Harry lead him through the empty common room, reminding Draco of how late it had gotten. He knew that tomorrow morning he'd wake and find the real nightmare once again consuming his every day. He was lead into Harry's dorm. Ron was fast asleep, with his curtains open, the other three beds were all closed tight. Outside these walls, the war was raging, and Draco was about to open the doors, and let it inside. As he was lead to Harry's bed, they both kicked off their shoes and lied down behind the closed curtains; Harry whispering a Silencing Charm. One last night to be happy, then he had to become who was born to be. A Slytherin, a son of a criminal, and the youngest Death Eater.


	4. Chapter 4

For The Will Of It, Part 2

Chapter 4: Pinnacle

By pantheradraconis

As the night grew darker, the air filled with a chill showing the first signs of winter. A small, old branch, leaning precariously against the castle's edge, was burdened down with the new weight of ice, and broke. Tumbling down to the ground, the twigs making up the farthest reaching edges of the branch scrapped across Harry's window, causing the boy to shutter. Draco felt the warm body against him and shivered himself. They had been lying next to each other, without even letting their arms touch, attempting to prevent any movement for several minutes. Neither spoke, unsure whether they should talk about the obvious distance that had broken between them ever since Professor Snape separated the two several hours earlier.

Draco's breathing quickened as he realized Harry didn't move his arm away. The feeling of his skin, of his warmth, of his entire body lying mere inches away from the blond, finally broke the boy. He leaned up over his boyfriend, reaching his right arm across the bed and pulled his chest across Harry's. At first the Gryffindor thought he was going to be kissed, but the blond silently rested his head on top of Harry's chest. Draco listened carefully to Harry's breathing, quick inhaled breathes followed by slow exhales. The blond smiled as he realized Harry was trying to contain his fast pacing heart, his electrified nerves, even the goosebumps on his arms. He did this. Draco had complete control over Harry's body. If he wanted to, he could reach his hand down and...

_What are you thinking? You're supposed to be breaking up with this boy. Don't you remember what Severus said to you? Everything depends on you leaving Harry behind._ Draco shifted his head to look up at Harry's face. The brunette was leaning his head back, eyes focused on the ceiling, trying to relax. Draco smiled and went back to his mischievous thoughts. _**I have tonight. Why not let us enjoy ourselves? Enjoy each other.**__ And then what happens in the morning? Are you going to sneak out while he's still asleep? What a cowardly thing to do. __**No! Of course not! I'm going to...**__ Let him down easy? Tell him you two have had a good run, last night was fun, but now you've got to do evil Death Eater things? _Draco was quickly getting aggravated with his thoughts arguing back and forth. He couldn't possibly go through with something as cruel as sleeping with Harry tonight and then bailing on him in the morning. He wasn't capable of something so vicious, so maleficent, so... evil. Like killing someone. If he couldn't do this, how could he save his family?

The very thought made Draco feel sick. No matter what he did now, or later, everything was going to end. This was the war to end it all, end his family, end his wealth, end his lover. Because what 16 year old boy can defeat the most powerful wizard in the world? What teenager thinks they can accomplish what no one else has been able to do? What others have tried, but failed at. Been killed, imprisoned, tortured, just for attempting! What kind of person takes on a task given to him by someone who could do it themselves, but simply wanted to show off that he had control over anyone and everyone.

The Slytherin sat up slowly, turning his body away from his boyfriend and allowing his feet to fall over the side of the bed, slowly touching the floor. He felt his toes land first, then his arches, and finally his heels. His ankles were pulled in, taking his calves, knees, and thighs. In seconds the boy was up to his waist in cold, hard, stone. His body stiffened at the idea, at the weight, and the pull. Then suddenly, almost like out of a dream, Draco felt a hand on his shoulder. It was rough and calloused, but felt like a soothing song. The image painted over his eyes was of blue; a soft, gentle blue covering the skies above him; a warm, melodious blue swimming around him. Draco couldn't feel any remorse, any doubt, any fear. The only thing Draco could feel was the soft lips pressed against his, the rough hand moving down along his chest, across his waist, turning him towards the warm body of his lover.

Harry pulled his boyfriend back onto the bed and gently down onto his own body. The Slytherin moved slowly, but with purpose. The two never stopped kissing, regardless of how much easier the movement would have been if they had. As Draco rested his chest on Harry's, he allowed his right leg to rest on the other side of Harry's body, straddling the boy. Draco could feel how hard Harry was and realized it was the first time he'd ever felt another man's hard-on. Heat rose up from the taller boy's stomach, stretching along his chest and up into his face. It was obvious Draco was blushing, but he tried to hide it by covering Harry's ear and neck in indulging kisses.

The snogging continued far into the early morning hours before either of the boys got the courage to do more. Draco leaned up and threw off his shirt after Harry kept biting the collar and Harry unbuckled his own pants to give Draco some incentive.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Draco breathed as he watched Harry fumbling with the buttons on his pants.

"I'm pretty damn positive, yeah." Harry's reply was fast. Straight to the point. Much like his attitude right now. It caused Draco to hesitate. "What's wrong? Are...Are you ready for this?"

"I just don't know. I mean, with everything going on, maybe we should wait. What if you just think you want me because of your raging teenage hormones. Maybe when you wake up in the morning you won't want me any more. What if that happens?"

"That's a bit dramatic, don't you think?" Harry was confused, as he usually was when it came to people's emotions. Draco could see the look on his face and knew that Harry wouldn't be able to explain it any further. His boyfriend was a bit dimwitted, but he was a wonderful boyfriend and Draco knew that if the next line out of his mouth was a request to stop, Harry would. And that was enough for him.

Draco smiled, "Yeah, it's dramatic. But I wouldn't be a Slytherin if I wasn't dramatic." The self-declared Slytherin then yanked his boyfriend's shirt off and continued his mission of hidden blushings and pleasure giving. As his head moved down along Harry's chest, biting along the muscular abs, Draco cautiously moved his hand across the front of Harry's now opened jeans. With a slow, warm breath, Draco wrapped his fingers around Harry's hard-on and both boys exhaled together. Awkward and unsure, the blond began stroking his boyfriend's cock slowly and reaching his entire length.

It felt like masturbating, but entirely different at the same time. Draco could hardly believe it. He remembered the first time he'd ever kissed a girl; it was Pansy and the kiss was chaste, but it had a feeling of importance, of closeness. His mind wandered to the first girl he'd necked with, the first girl he saw naked, the girl he almost lost his virginity to. It was funny to him how he had always been the one to stop things from going too far. The blond then brought his mind to his new lover; how the brunette could cause a hard-on just brushing his fingers through Draco's hair. The Slytherin's hand moved faster at the re-occurring dream of what it would feel like to have Harry's mouth around his...

Harry's breathing had quickened right along with Draco's and with two more thrusts into the blonde's hand, he came. Draco felt elated, like he was floating on air. The two boys' mouths crashed together as they lay with only Harry's cum between their chests.

The Gryffindor wasted no time in flipping Draco over and ripping the blonde's pants off. Stopping only to smile at the tight fitting boxer briefs, Harry moved with all the bravery a lion would possess. None of the hesitation or debating that would cause Draco to stop had any time to form before Harry's hands were proudly holding Draco's cock; seconds later, the brunette's mouth followed.

It felt amazing, it felt exhilarating, it felt nauseating. Draco couldn't keep his body still or his mind focused long enough to wrap an idea around his head quite like Harry's tongue was wrapped around his other head. The blond felt like he was going to lose consciousness as he realized he didn't know which way was up anymore. He realized this must be what it's like to have no control, to be completely at the mercy of the person you're with. Draco had never allowed that to happen in the past. Any time he was with a girl, he was hovering over her, he had his hands on her, he decided what they were going to do and when they were going to do it. But this, this was too much.

Confusion was mixed up with passion and desire in his head, but it was very much there. The Slytherin couldn't decide if he wanted to cum, to run out the door, or to shove his increasingly hard cock right into Harry's... Thought lost itself as Draco exploded into Harry's mouth. The brunette popped his head back in surprise, choking slightly on the cum in the back of his throat. The boy turned and spit over the side of his bed and coughed harshly.

Draco looked terrified.

How could he have let this happen. Was this what was supposed to happen when you got a blow job? No, that can't be right. It's so awkward, but then again sex in general was awkward to the virgin boy. The idea of kissing and thrusting and moving your hands all at once was quite absurd. Not that he couldn't do it, the idea was just...a lot to do. How does one keep their head straight? You're supposed to be doing all of these actions while paying attention to the other person and what they want. Apparently you're also supposed to be paying attention to what you want, something that had never occurred to the blond. With masturbation, he would just let his mind wander and then cum unexpecte... _Oh, bugger!_

"Are you... okay?"

Harry looked up at his boyfriend and smiled. "I don't think I was expecting quite the cumming!" The brunette laughed. "That was the explosion of the year, I'd say." He leaned over the bed and reach out the curtains, retrieving a handkerchief he then used to wipe off his face.

The blond blushed, "I, uh, sorry."

Looking up at his boyfriend, the brunette smirked saying, "I should say so, that was quite the choking hazard, and I'm talking about before you finished. I never realized the work involved with giving head. In stories it always sounded so simple, place mouth around cock and move in an up and down fashion. Of course they usually end with the guy cumming somewhere other than the back of the throat."

Harry continued on with descriptions of stories where he read about other such pornographic situations, while Draco became more and more uncomfortable with the whole situation. He squirmed on the bed until able to pull his jeans back onto himself. Harry casted a quick spell on both of them, cleaning the cum up off the bed, the clothing, and anywhere else it might have landed. The blond found his shirt, and went to pull it over his head when Harry finally noticed the distance Draco had slowly brought between the two of them, despite the size of a twin mattress.

"Are you okay?" Harry turned his body to face Draco, but kept the distance so as not to scare the boy away.

"Yeah, I just..." The blond looked around to think of an answer, but didn't know how to explain his feelings.

"This is quite a turn of events. I seem to be talking my head off and you're stuttering over your words." That didn't seem to help the situation as the Slytherin looked down at his hands and started picking under his nails. "I didn't mean. Oh, bloody hell. I don't know what I mean. What's wrong Draco? Did I go too far? Do you regret it now? Was it because I choked? I'm not exactly a veteran at blow jobs, so I just didn't expect..."

"Shh." Draco silenced Harry with his finger on the latter boys lips. "Sorry, it's just. Everything." The boy sighed slowly. "You're wonderful. I don't deserve you. And this... this was wonderful. Awkward, but wonderful. But I need to... I need to tell you something...to..." His words faltered, unsure of where to go, of what to say next. _Just say it, spit it out, it'll make life a lot easier. You're a Death Eater now, you've got to do your part of things, you've got to take care of yourself, of your family; your mother. The time is now. And when the war is over, tonight won't matter anymore._ Draco decided to lie to himself and say tonight won't matter. As he went on with his speech about the two boys not being meant for each other and how continuing with this relationship was foolish for everyone, Draco allowed himself to believe in the lie.

Silence deafened the Death Eater's ears as he saw Harry yelling. His mouth exploded with words and curses, but silence was the only thing Draco could hear anymore. He stood up and turned the corner around Harry's bed, walking towards the door. Ron woke up, along with two other Gryffindors Draco believed to be Seamus and the lanky boy Ginny was dating. One more bed stayed silent. Completely silent. The blond turned just in time to have Ron's hand land in the unwelcomed guest's left eye. He couldn't feel it, but he knew it'd hurt later. All of this would hurt later. But not now; He was unwelcomed, unwanted, and unloved. Just the way he was supposed to be. Because only then could he do what he needed to do. Finally detached from his own body, the Death Eater proceeded out of the dorm room, down the stairs, and out the photo of the Fat Lady. She waved goodbye, but it was lost on the student. No longer a boy, but never a man, Draco felt his body sink into the floor. He lost himself entirely to the castle, sinking far past the dungeons and secret chambers below. And the Draco that first walked through the entry doors was no more, the Death Eater that left the castle behind him was the one that could do everything he was set out to do that year. And with that one last thought, Draco left the castle.

The only eyes to see this last move were those of Albus Dumblerdore. He stood at the astronomy tower, staring not at the stars above, but at the dreams below. Knowing full well that Draco would be back, but not the same, the old professor frowned, wishing more could have been done. It seemed the time he spent nowadays was more in the past with its mistakes than in the future with its new problems.

When Professor McGonagall showed up at Dumbledore's side, the news of a fight in the Gryffindor common area didn't surprise him. He merely shared a sad smile and then both watched the young Slytherin move past the metal gates and quickly slip out of view.


End file.
